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Showing posts with label Lehrer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lehrer. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

A Christmas Carol


(Seeing Santa Claus, 1876 by Thomas Nast,
1840-1902, American editorial cartoonist)

Tom Lehrer was a university lecturer in mathematics when he started to compose satirical ditties and perform them at the piano. The recordings of his night club shows in the 1950s and 60s remain popular because the lyrics, with only a few exceptions, are still topical. They could have been written yesterday.

To listen to a tape of Lehrer’s performance of this song, click on the link (you may have to cut and paste):


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSlpCBek1_M

A CHRISTMAS CAROL

Christmas time is here, by golly,
Disapproval would be folly,
Deck the halls with hunks of holly,
Fill the cup and don’t say “when.”

Kill the turkeys, ducks and chickens,
Mix the punch, drag out the Dickens,
Even though the prospect sickens,
Brother, here we go again.

On Christmas Day you can’t get sore,
Your fellow man you must adore,
There’s time to rob him all the more
The other three hundred and sixty-four.

Relations, sparing no expense’ll
Send some useless old utensil,
Or a matching pen and pencil.
“Just the thing I need! How nice!”

It doesn’t matter how sincere it
Is, nor how heartfelt the spirit,
Sentiment will not endear it,
What's important is the price.

Hark the Herald Tribune sings,
Advertising wondrous things.
God rest ye merry, merchants,
May you make the Yuletide pay.
Angels we have heard on high
Tell us to go out and buy!

So let the raucous sleigh bells jingle,
Hail our dear old friend Kris Kringle,
Driving his reindeer across the sky.
Don’t stand underneath when they fly by.

~ Tom Lehrer, born 1928, American satirist, pianist, and mathematician, from An Evening (Wasted) with Tom Lehrer

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Can’t Help Lovin’ Dat Man


(Couple in MG, Florence 1952, by Ruth Orkin, 1921-1985,
American photographer)

Mr. Right is never Mr. Perfect, so you learn to make the best of it, like Julie in the 1927 musical Show Boat.

CAN’T HELP LOVIN’ DAT MAN

Fish got to swim, birds got to fly,
I got to love one man till I die,
Can’t help lovin’ dat man of mine.
Tell me he’s lazy, tell me he’s slow,
Tell me I’m crazy (maybe I know),
Can’t help lovin’ dat man of mine.

~ Oscar Hammerstein II (1895-1960), American lyricist, and Jerome Kern (1885-1945), American composer

Three decades later, Tom Lehrer composed his own version of this ode to true love.

SHE’S MY GIRL

Sharks gotta swim, and bats gotta fly,
I gotta love one woman till I die.
To Ed or Dick or Bob
She may just be a slob,
But to me,
She’s my girl.

In winter the bedroom is one large ice cube,
And she squeezes the toothpaste from the middle of the tube.
Her hairs in the sink
Have driven me to drink,
But she’s my girl, she’s my girl, she’s my girl,
And I love her.

The girl that I lament for,
The girl my money’s spent for,
The girl my back is bent for,
The girl I gave up Lent for,
Is the girl that heaven meant for me.

So though for breakfast she makes coffee that tastes like shampoo,
I come home to dinner and get peanut butter stew,
Or if I’m in luck,
It’s a broiled hockey puck,
But, oh, well, what the hell,
She’s my girl,
And I love her.

~ Tom Lehrer, born 1928, American satirist, pianist and mathematician